Flu Remedy Update

You may recall that, a couple of weeks ago, I expressed my general disdain for the cold & flu remedies peddled by subsidiaries of big petro-chemical companies such as 3M, Monsanto & Dupont.

I asked my faithful readers for their input on this perplexing issue - remember, my main gripe was finding one of these that enabled me to function in the real world when sick - as all of their advertising promises.

Well, this week I received this homemade natural remedy from a long-time reader - let's call her 'Aunty Vicky'. It came via email so I thought I should share it in this post - as swine flu is looming.

So here it is - Vicky is in blue I am in red:


My suggestion is two to three lemons with manuka honey (only manuka as that has the healing stuff in it lol) in hot water....

Sounds great so far - a real earth mother is our Aunty Vicky, her Mum would approve I am sure.


With a damn decent slug of whisky...

OK, not so earth mothery, but I guess we are still dealing with naturally occuring products here - lets read on....

slug down 2 paracetamols and 2 neurophens (sic) with cold water beforehand, then sip the lemon, honey and whiskey hot drink...

Sheesh - I'm pretty sure that's only one narcotic short of the cocktail that killed River Phoenix, Janis Joplin & Heath Ledger......

I guarantee you will feel lovely in about 20 mins:)

I guarantee that I will feel NOTHING in about 20 minutes!

Apparently Auntie Vicky studied (and partied) hard at the Keith Richards school of naturopathy back in the early 90's - I can't see myself picking the kids up from daycare on that 'remedy'!

The search continues....:)

TA

Man-flu remedies (Yep, I'm off-topic again!)

Regular readers will be aware that I have been bravely battling a bout of man-flu for nearly two weeks now. Consequently, I have become very sensitised to the cold & flu remedy ads that are in high rotation on TV at present.

Over the years I have tried most brands to no avail. At best they leave me feeling mildly brain-dead and marginally healthier. The nastier ones generally find me crawling off to my bedroom fantasising about the peace of the grave.

I have never once taken one of these remedies and made a career-saving powerpoint presentation, built a tree hut for the kids, or as in the latest Coldrex ad, felt like busting sum phat beats wid' my (Eminem wannabe) homies!

Have any of you guys had a different experience? Can anyone recommend one of these snakeoil remedies that works?

I'd appreciate your help....boom...chicka...bow...boof...boof...lo-five...

TA

Man Flu Machinations (it's satirical Kristen)

I have noticed a general lack of acceptance, recognition and understanding regarding the impact of the 'man-flu'.

As I lay tossing and turning in bed at 4 this morning, ravaged by this latest bout of masculine influenza, I turned my mind to understanding why we men get hit so much harder than women when afflicted by illness.

And I'll be darned if I didn't crack this mystery of the ages once and for all!

It's pretty simple really. We modern men operate at such a high level these days - seamlessly performing so many roles, so proficiently - that we are reaching, and often exceeding, the physical limits of our bodies.

To use an un-apologetically male-oriented metaphor, we men are like highly tuned sports cars - the Ferrari of the species if you will. Problem is, a mechanical failure in a state of the art engineering masterpiece running at 10,000 RPM is naturally going to be more catastrophic than the same failure in a RAV4 trundling around the Westfield parking lot. The Ferrari is going to need a lot more time in the garage, with a lot of specialist attention.

It's bad enough, seizing up and hitting the wall in top gear, but what really hurts us men is the sanctimonious derision we suffer through. If this same affliction struck women, we would have at least three national charities researching a cure, 'Hikois' demanding government funding and Petra Bagust and Mandy Barker would both have a T-shirt on the shelves.

However, we men stoically do what we do best - we go to the garage and get busy with the business of getting better, please society, just let us be.....

TA*

* it should be noted that Sarah has been very supportive of my recuperative process this week.

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Of Boogers and Bacteria

We're back from Mt Cook, after a reasonably frustrating week of shooting - dodgy weather combined with the requisite bout of daycare-induced illness which has cascaded through three quarters of the family now - with Sarah being in the unenviable position of being the sole survivor, stuck in a house with three lethargic and grumpy patients.

Being the 'last man standing' is almost enough to make you chew on a used kleenex so you can rid yourself of the virally infested Damocles sword that is dripping above your head when surrounded by sickos like this.

Illness is always a tricky one to figure out with kids. You never seem to see it coming, as they generally mask the early symptoms with grumpiness, irrational behaviour, spasmodic outbursts of tantrum-ism and thrown bowls of food. Like I say, you never see it coming, as it just like any other day.

It is not until 11:45 PM (invariably on a Friday night, to maximise doctors and pharmacy costs) when they awake, hallucinating with a 39º temperature and covered in snot that you put two and two together.

Poor old Jack was the second victim of this latest bout and even at 3 years of age, he gave no indication of his decline, other than an onset of 'laziness' while I was dragging him out of for a walk at dusk (in sub-zero temperatures). I drove the poor little fellow like an iditarod dog handler, coaxing him with promises of moro bars and hot chocolates before eventually doubling him up with Indi in the mountain buggy for the walk home in the dark (I did manage to get quite a nice shot though).

The next morning Jack sounded raspier than Judge Judy after a night on the town and was barking like a elephant seal that had ingested a rottweiler whole - 'laziness' explained.

As so often happens, I was next to succumb and that oh-so-familiar wave of guilt accompanied my symptoms as my energy levels plummeted and I struggled to walk from the bedroom to the kitchen - in a motel unit...... of course my symptoms are exponentially more grievous given the well-documented severity of the 'man-flu'

TA